Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Remission – Is it a Good Thing?

by Carley Cooper  Click to download this pic on FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I think one of the less talked about aspects of Bipolar Disorder is what happens when one is stable.  I mean we hear lots about both the depression side and the mania/hypomania side.  But, what about life as a stable person? Some call it remission. No depression and no mania.  Most people would think this is a non-issue. For the average person who doesn’t know BPD it isn’t an issue.

For those of us who only know living in extremes, it is unknown territory to be stable; to stay coloring inside the lines.  That’s where I’ve been for at least a year now.  It’s the first time I’ve been to this place for this long.  The strangest part is I’m not sure I like it.

I Miss the Extremes

I’m tempted to adjust my meds to make myself go into hypomania just a little bit.  The problem is there is no ‘little bit’.  There’s only ‘wanting more’ and more of the same.

There’s Always a Flip Side

Of course, having hypomania experiences means having depression episodes as well.  The logical side of me knows this.  I also know that wanting to mess with my medication is also a bipolar trait.  I have to be careful not to fall into that trap which could potentially derail me completely.

Change is Part of Life and Bipolar

This could be a whole new chapter of my life. Maybe the discomfort I’m feeling lies in the fact that I don’t like change much. Then again, bipolar is all about change.

Has anyone else struggled with this? How have you dealt with it?

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1 comment:

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